Bank Of Thoughts & Nonsense

Please do not think that I'm about to kill myself or circulating my head with suicide. This post is quite the paradox, because it's actually a very positive one. I just needed to jot my thoughts down, to preserve it. I decided to jot it here, cos it's definitely more permanent than any piece of paper where the lead on it will fade. Besides, no one really reads this blog, but if you are doing that now, that was just a notice.

I think everything happens for a reason, or at least I've been led to believe that. So whenever I'm in intense pain, I imagine that I should really get something out of the painful situation. That maybe if I learned my lesson for good, I won't have to go through all that pain again. That maybe if I didn't have such rotten thoughts or had such a rotten heart , I would never have to go through all that shit. And that makes me want to be a better person, to do better things because deep down inside, if I were better and I knew I were better, then I wouldn't have much to feel guilty about. Then my thoughts won't go directly to,"What did I do wrong?" , when shit happens. Instead my thoughts will go to...I honestly don't know what I want my thoughts to go to.

In fact, I forgot why I'm having this post in the first place.

I just know that I should be a little less of an ass and a little more of a human, I think this post was to remind me that.

Oh,and it also serves to remind me that I have to take all the shit in the world the Zen way, which I am trying to put all my Zen-ness to good use now by trying to turn every painful moment to a learning moment. It's like writing history books just so people won't repeat the same mistakes, yeah, this post is like that.

Damn, this is one hasty post.

Green Tip : Don't leave your MP3 players / iPods on and try to put your laptop to sleep mode if you refuse to turn it off.

-TANK